A couple of weeks ago I am opening my fortune cookie from Panda Express. I have really tried hard to not take these serious but this one was classic. And ever so timely…..
Be quicker of mind than of tounge.
Oh if I could remember this quote during times of stress. I am however not quicker of mind than of tounge in most cases. So I guess I’ll just keep offending the poor, the down trodden, and the lonley.
Let’s just start with an example that happened a couple of months ago. Little old man in our church congregation had lost his wife about 2 years ago. It was sudden and he was devistated. He has grieved for a long time. His small frame wandered down the hall and I was at the library of our church getting supplies. My husband asked him how he was doing. He paused and said he had been diagnosed with cancer. That it didn’t look like he would recover. He was pretty chipper when he said, "I am ok with it"
I was only half there in the hall that day. My simple reply was….."Oh, it’s about time Bill."
You see in my infintesimal brain the connection between the man’s death and the reunion with his wife in the afterlife would have been great. At the same time came the thought of his 82 year old body traveling, and doing all this stuff that men half his age had a hard time doing. He was in great shape for 82 and I wanted to say that it was about time something slowed him down a bit. But I never completed the thought.
I was talking to my husband and asked him if I said it out loud and just let it hang there. He confirmed that I had said it but, it didn’t seem like the man wasn’t paying attention to me when I said it. Phew!
That evening I think my prayer was "please bless poor Bill, and bless him with amnisia, or deftness if I ever attempt show my sympathy for his situation again."
I wish I could be more like my brother. Who when pulled over by a ladycop states that he has his license but not his registration. He explains that it used to be his grandmother’s car and he was transfering the title into his name. And he says to her in his most sultry voice.
"That’s right. I am going to be a Car owner."
To which she replies, "You mean to tell me you are going to own your grandmother’s 1986 honda civic?"
And with out skipping a beat he says, "HOT huh! I know it’s a big hit with all the ladies." They both laughed and he got off with a warning.