Classes during summer stinks!! But I love what I am taking. My Coping with Difficult People had a section on squelching. Here are some excerpts from the portion that I thought was pretty funny. Now the lecture strictly explained these are NOT for those relationships that are close and those you wish to have a close tie with. Just for those people that really are toxic criticizers/sarcasticly biting. These kind of abruptly end the discourse
1. Please breathe the other way. You’re bleaching my hair.
2. Don’t you need a license to be so mean?
3. Could I sell you a ticket to some place?
4. Your voice is a bit too loud for in door use.
5. You’re the type that would throw a beer party and lock the bathroom.
6. I hope a pregnant elephant sits on your car keys
7. Give me a minute. I’m trying to find a way to ignore you.
8. Have I ever told you that the wart on your face is your best feature?
9. Don’t feel bad, a lot of people have no talent.
10. You have a mind like a steel trap, always closed.
11. Have you considered opening a branch mouth.
12. I couldn’t warm up to you if we were cremated together.
13. Do you believe in hate at first sight?
14. Don’t worry about being replaced by an automation. They haven’t invented a machine that does nothing yet.
15. I heard you were arrested for mooning yesterday, but they had to release you when they found out it was your face.
16. I don’t know what makes you so obnoxious, but whatever it is it’s working.
17. If you were your parents only child, I don’t think you would be their favorite.
18. If I throw you a stick will you leave?
19. Does your train of thought have a caboose?
20. See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.
21. Back off, you’re standing in my aura.
22. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?
23. Nice perfume, but must you marinate in it?
24. Is it time for your medication or mine?
25. Let me show you how the guards used to do it.
These are borrowed mostly from Bill Dana, famous for his José Jimenez alter ego.
Holly Brook: Saturdays
Sarah: Ordinary miracles
Fat Boy Slim: The Joker, Magic Carpet Ride, Weapon of Choice. (Kitchen Cleaning JAMS)
When Harry Met Sally (Soundtrack)
The Dangerous book of Boys (or something like that)
Seven Habits of Highly Effective People
Transformers, Harry Potter(7th), Harry Potter the movie,
BabyHawk Mei Tai (Go ahead, google it I dare you)
The six pouches that hold all your different chargers and cords in a safe uncluttered manner(will add pics and review of product if I purchase